lonely.

only God knows how lonely i am.. sometimes i made up conversations in my mind just to feel needed, like someone actually cares for me.. someone who i can hold on to, who i can turn to, but its only in my head.. pathetic, i know.. and its all my fault -- for this hole in my heart and this miserable feelings, all because i made a wrong choice.. and now i have to suffer for the rest of my empty life.. no one can and will save me.. its just me here, all alone and lonely.

wasted my chance of happiness with my high school sweetheart, the love of my life, the one and only — for someone so mediocre and disappointing.