flooded with all this pain, knowing that i'll never hold you -- like i did before the storm :(

i was having the worst hangover this morning. i never felt this sick, and the great part is my anatomy spotter was in the afternoon. tu laa pandai sangat keluar enjoy tak beragak di malam exam, tapi tapi, nasib baik the paper was easy! fuhh luckily :) well anw, i miss you like a lot :( remember i jaga you dulu masa you pass out, baik tak i? ehehee i used to love you that much. you know, sebab utama we may never be together ( because of our " difference " ) i might as well just leave my home, my family, our country -- for you. betul ni tak tipu, i sayang you that much. but now things happened :( we lost it. i pun tak tahu apa nak buat except hidup macam biasa and be happy with whatever yang ada depan i. you tahu kalau you mintak i patah balik pada you, bila-bila also i sanggup. tapi you taknak. maybe it's true, i wasn't the girl for you. maybe sebab i ni mengada-ngada, i suka complained benda remeh dekat you, i kadang-kadang marah you je, i tak layan you good enough, i'm a failure, i tak pernah yakin of myself, i tak cukup fun to you, etc etc. maybe that's why you dunno whether you love me or not, maybe sebab memang you tak love me. i je yang terhegeh-hegeh, kan?