because a lifetime is too long.

i don't know how long can i survive this but i know it won't be forever. i wish i could just pack up my things and go, but i can't. i wish there's someone who would just come and save me from this misery, but nobody came. i'm just so lonely and tired. i go about my life as usual, said i'm fine - but it wasn't true. carrying another person inside of me is so exhausting, considering i'm already depressed with the current two. especially when it's his. what part of me don't love him anymore that he doesn't understand? i don't love you, i don't love you, i don't love you. fucking let me go please. shitty life. i hate everything.