i supposed i think about love more than anyone really should. it was Shakespeare who also said LOVE IS BLIND -- now, that is something i know to be true :) for some, quite inexplicably -- love fades. for others, love is simply lost. but then of course, love can also be found, even if just for the night :)

I SUPPOSED, THIS IS HOW THE STORY GOES :D

ehehee tetiba ter-main twitter pulak sekarang, macam besh kot benda ni. boleh update anything ikut suka, tak payah macam annoying gila nak update fb status tiap masa. eyh i tak outdated okayy, dah lama ada account dia cuma dulu agak kurang minat nak main. password pun sampai dah lupa, tadi baru re-create balik :D for those yang interested, ayuhh follow :

http://twitter.com/mimiehanna

flooded with all this pain, knowing that i'll never hold you -- like i did before the storm :(

i was having the worst hangover this morning. i never felt this sick, and the great part is my anatomy spotter was in the afternoon. tu laa pandai sangat keluar enjoy tak beragak di malam exam, tapi tapi, nasib baik the paper was easy! fuhh luckily :) well anw, i miss you like a lot :( remember i jaga you dulu masa you pass out, baik tak i? ehehee i used to love you that much. you know, sebab utama we may never be together ( because of our " difference " ) i might as well just leave my home, my family, our country -- for you. betul ni tak tipu, i sayang you that much. but now things happened :( we lost it. i pun tak tahu apa nak buat except hidup macam biasa and be happy with whatever yang ada depan i. you tahu kalau you mintak i patah balik pada you, bila-bila also i sanggup. tapi you taknak. maybe it's true, i wasn't the girl for you. maybe sebab i ni mengada-ngada, i suka complained benda remeh dekat you, i kadang-kadang marah you je, i tak layan you good enough, i'm a failure, i tak pernah yakin of myself, i tak cukup fun to you, etc etc. maybe that's why you dunno whether you love me or not, maybe sebab memang you tak love me. i je yang terhegeh-hegeh, kan?

hanya dirimu yang ku cinta dan ku kenang, di dalam hatiku takkan pernah hilang -- bayangan dirimu untuk selamanya.

FUCK WHAT I SAID, IT DON'T MEAN SHIT NOW.

rasa sangat tak boleh blah ar today, disappointed gila. benci lah. tak kira buat berapa juta kali pun, kalau memang tak boleh, memang tak boleh jugak. bullshit lah. rasa nak bakar semua benda, pergi mampus lah. semenjak datang sini je jadi macam bodoh gila, tak pernah gagal seumur hidup kot sebelum ni. even add maths dulu-dulu zaman sekolah relax je dapat 100 % tapi bila sampai sini tak tidur 2 hari 2 malam pun nak dapat takat 50 % macam mustahil. eyh fuck that shit up lah, nak pergi terjun bangunan. bye.

I DON'T CARE, I HAVE NO LUCK -- I DON'T MISS IT ALL THAT MUCH :)

it's good to have this type of r/ship, really. no need to give too much effort on it, and my big focus don't have to be on it. he got his life, and i got mine. better off that way, i guess. in fact, i don't even know how to put my feeling towards anyone ever again. all this while, i've been trying too much and that's completely worthless. love sux big time, so fuck it. i got so many things, and too little time :)

hey sexy girl, from kuala-la-la lumpur :D hey baby, that's me -- i'll be on the dance-floor!

here i have one more video to share :D aww, mizz nina is super duper hyper hot! she's a malay girl, from malaysia, and she's singing with colby o'donis! like OMGGGG, how cool is that? i'm proud to be malaysian malay, hahahaa! tapi tapi, kalau kita tengok dekat youtube tu, dekat bawah tu, macam-macam orang yang comment -- including those close-minded ppl. biar ar dia nak pakai macam mana, nak gedik ke apa, dia hot kot. rambut lawa, body lawa, yang korang dengki tak beragak kenapa? boleh ke nak nyanyi dengan penyanyi antarabangsa macam dia? ohh plz, takkan mesti nak suruh dia pakai tudung, baju kurung semua kot? dalam international music video, seriously? gila tak berkembang pemikiran. pergi lah duduk dalam gua nangis-nangis bila " penyanyi " akademi fantasia keluar tiap minggu, sengal betul. kalau dah alim sangat kan tak payah lah bukak youtube apa bagai, baca buku ilmiah sana, ni hantar comment kutuk-kutuk singer from your own country, bodoh ar buat semak je korang ni. hehh :p anw you go mizz nina! keep up the good work ♥ muaxx salam perantauan ( tetiba :D )

PENEMUAN TERBARU :D

ME vs LESLIE BIBB

HAHAA VAIN GILA TAK ?

p/s : tengok tu, cuma eyebrow dengan nose je lain. but can't help it lah, i'm asian okayy :DD

ADA DAN TIADA CINTA, BAGIKU TAK MENGAPA -- NAMUN ADA YANG HILANG, SEPARUH DIRIKU.

i spoke to my bestie the other day. and she said, you suka buli i sebenarnya. you, yes you -- the selfish-ignorant-manipulative-coward SOB. sebab apa? well, you boleh fikir sendiri kan. the more i think, the more i realize yang memang there's nothing wrong with me. it's you, it's always you all along. tapi i dah ter-sayang you, nak buat macam mana? huu anw, i usha youtube sambil belajar last nite. then i jumpa lagu bawah ni :D sumpah rindu you sangat, sedih lah :(

i watch the walls around me crumble, but it's not like i won't build them up again :)

hey you. esok i punya block exam, so i think macam takde apa-apa emosi sangat nak cakap dekat you. i miss you, that's for sure :) tapi you study well also, tau? petang ni nak kena mula running balik, since the boyfie pun dah habis exam ( eche, sejak bila ntah ni :D ) yeayy, end-point mari! kadang-kadang i rasa gembira, sometimes rasa macam tipu diri sendiri, urgh i pun tak tahu sebenarnya. but yang i tahu, i kena move on jugak no matter what sebab you taknak dekat i pun kan? better i'm with someone yang hargai i, yang sayang i :) so yeahh. ini bukan emotional black-mail okayy, ini pasrah namanya. you lah, asek buat orang sedih je. siapa boleh tahan?


p/s : jay sean -- bf kedua selepas enrique iglesias. come babyboy! push it up on me harder, harderrrr :p

i will admit it, if you admit it

it's harder than we both thought

it's easier to fall apart

look where we are

i can forgive it, i can't forget it

you've left me here with all these scars

and you can't deny the hardest part

i'm not in your arms ...

sorry. emo terlebih :D okayy perasaan dah stabil sikit. cuma pening kepala sebab tak cukup tidur je, bukan taknak tidur tapi memang tak boleh tidur. woohoo can't wait for tonight! it's saturday night, people. ayuhh chill out and forget our problems! :DD

SAKIT HATI LAH. BY HEARING YOUR NAME ALSO I DAH SAKIT HATI MACAM GILA-GILA SANGAT, I HATE U LAH. LAGI CEPAT U BLAH DARI MANIPAL LAGI BAGUS. OKAYY BYE.

sumpah i sebenarnya tak faham kenapa you perlu wujud dalam hidup i. i tak pernah noticed pasal you langsung pun dulu. i cuma tahu nama you and you punya roll number, tu je. lepas tu tetiba you cakap-cakap dengan i that night. you layan i merepek pasal my stupid ex-bf and, the next thing i know i left my current bf for you. i taknak mengaku sangat i tinggal dia sebab you ( sebab macam pathetic gila je ) tapi memang that was the truth. and the next thing i know, you tetiba tinggal i for god knows what super great reasons. and the next thing i know, you datang balik. i think i was happy tapi kurang sebulan from that, the next thing i know you tinggal i balik. lepas tu seriously, i memang devastated gila. dalam almost two months i cuba taknak sedih, but the next thing i know, we got back together. okayy that was -- undescribable. and then, i yang bodoh ni thought we can make it works. yup, mesti lah i rasa macam tu sebab we did survived that one month when we were apart. but after that, bila kita dekat asyik nak gaduh pulak. gaduh pun over some silly stuffs, and the next thing i know, we broke-up, again. sengal, you ingat i ni roller-coster ke apa? lepas tu dalam dah sebulan, elok-elok i rasa macam dah move on, for OMIGOD I DUNNO WHAT FUCKING REASONS -- you called me, we met up, and then next thing i know, my mind is all messed-up, again. you know what, FY lah. FYVVM. buang lah semua benda, buat lah macam semua tu i yang salah, suka hati your fucking heart lah nak rasa apa, biar lah your fucking brain nak fikir apa, i fucking don't care. half a year hidup i terhabis untuk you je, untuk you je tau, dan sekarang apa yang i dapat? perasaan sakit hati yang sangat-sangat. FM lah.

I'M WAY TOO COOL FOR YOU BOY, THAT'S WHY IT'LL NEVER WORK :D

i'm starting to love my life now. see, i dah laa repeat satu subjek je. free terlampau sebab class sikit sangat. then orang lain duk suffer kena stay up malam-malam study, i relax je layan series. ehehee seronok kot :p pastu sebab i extend satu tahun kan, i dapat scholar lagi banyak dari orang lain. siapa taknak duet free? belajar pun tak payah struggle sangat, class test senang gila, memang hidup lepak gila ah. dulu yelah i asek rasa bosan, tak tahu nak buat apa bagai semua, sekarang dah besh sebab ada someone yang boleh teman i selalu, without i perlu nak rasa guilty ke apa coz amik masa dia. yeayy, i'm awesome! haha tetiba :D okayy sebenarnya perasaan happy ni kesan from yesterday sebab tetiba MAS buat offer -- return tix for 12K rupee je. tengok, i'm so lucky! dah laa tak payah naik airasia yang pelik tu, then tak payah kuar duet sendiri pulak, sebab online booking pakai credit card mama je. yes yes end of august ni balik malaysia, nak shopping sakan with my bestie :) sambut raya, and hantar my darling sister fly to UK. whoaaa good things, much goods ahead! :DD

i need you, more than you'll ever know. i still do, willing to let it show.

i guess i'll keep, i guess you'll keep

every memory

sadly we may never be

i'll bet my tears, i'll bet your tears

i'll bet those tears

over time could disappear ..

you left before, this time you will stay gone -- that's for sure.

serena : yeah, i think i need to be alone for awhile.

nate : whoa, whoa, whoa. wait. i find it in my heart to forgive you for kissing another guy and you're gonna break up with me?

serena : it's not breaking up, it's -- it's just taking a break. it's not you ..

nate : ohh? " it's not you, it's me " right? yes, serena -- it is you. you know, i think it's great that you want to work on yourself, but i'm not gonna wait around to see how things go. so if you're out, you're out.

serena : that's fair. nate, i love you. i really do. but if we're ever gonna have a real chance, this is the only way.

okayy i dunno, it's like a curse or something. tiap kali i kasi apa-apa to the boyfie / or the guy i'm seeing, mesti lepas tu sesuatu yang buruk akan jadi. that bad thing means samada after that kitorg dah tak kawan lagi, or lost contact, or gaduh, or even broke-up. benci okayy. dah laa mahal pulak tu benda-benda yang i bagi, kalau setakat puluh-puluh ringgit takpe lagi. macam sia-sia je, eii geram. rasa nak baling crystal ni sampai pecah. urgh wait up, tak sampai hati lah :( tengok, sejahat-jahat i pun maseh ada perasaan tau. tapi sumpah lepas ni i takkan berhabis macam perempuan bangang dah. pembaziran okayy. takpe if you wanna gimme anything takpe ( you're most welcome, in fact :p ) tapi seriously lah yea, i tak mahu dan takkan beri you apa-apa. i'm sorry, but tukar-tukar hadiah now is sooo not my policy :D

kau beri rasa yang berbeza, mungkin ku salah mengertikannya -- yang ku rasa cinta.

kau hancurkan hatiku, kau hancurkan lagi

kau hancurkan hatiku untuk melihatmu,

kau terangi jiwaku, kau redupkan lagi

kau hancurkan hatiku untuk melihatmu ..

i'll never forget you, they said we'll never make it -- my sweet joy, always remember me :D